Sorry

So I said I would post about the real stuff like the real stuff that touched about Little Lights today, but sorry. :(

Today was filled with productivity, then a stretch of relaxation/frisbee/chilling. Then work. And now sleep so I can get up early to do work and get a haircut with Mr. I.

Tomorrow I found out about TFA. Honestly... thinking another rejection, and if I'm not rejected here probably in final round. Do I even know if I would take it? Part of me wants to. Like really wants to. Part of me is freaking scared out of my mind about it... cause if I do actually do it... gonna be so hard. But... I'm getting tired of applying for jobs, and honestly I might just go overseas like I've said before, but it'd be like a 2 year commitment... crazy. How would I change in those two years? How would other people change? Would I be able to do the things I want to do? Take care of the things that I want to take care of? I dunno.

Today... I felt pretty lonely. I've been realizing that... when I move on from UVA it's only going to get harder, and if I do go overseas... ya... But it's good. I'm reminding myself to fight for Christ, and to really die to these stupid feelings. I hope that I can really be a good Christian. Someone that people say ya, he lives for Christ haha. But even if they don't, if I'm living for Christ and He approves, that's good enough.

Little Lights really reminded me about prayer, and I hope that you (whoever you are) are praying lol. Like really praying, but ya side note. Peace out. Too many "questions of irrelevance are testing my intelligence," so I need to sleep (quote from Gowe haha). Allsoooo, take a look at the stars sometime. When I do... I find myself being still before something majestic. I hope that you have something that helps you do that too.