A Female's Most Powerful Weapon

Tears.

I'm driving a lot this month. To RVA or NOVA or both pretty much every weekend this month. Just now... as I was getting my cousin ready for bed she started crying. Not in the fake way that a lot of kids cry, but very genuine tears. Not the loud kind either, the silent tears of a child trying to desperately not cry, but unable to hold it in. Knowing she shouldn't cry, but slowly they streamed down one by one. She wanted her parents. She's 3 you know, so you can't really reason with her, but as she started crying, part of me broke/resonated. Haha.

Memories of doing the same mixed with feelings of just wanting to help her know she's loved and that they are coming back soon enough. I can still remember when I was a kid, and I was in day care or basically night time care because it was before my mother stopped working night shift. I remember missing her, and being super sad because I was sleeping and she wasn't there.

All I could do for my cousin was to sound out those words of they are coming. And pathetically I tried to distract her by saying aww look at your stuffed animals. What are their names? And I listed off name, after name, and she denied each one. She had initially shaken her head at them having names, and then finally I said one she liked Ariel (yes like the Little Mermaid, we had just watched it together). But as soon as I started to feel accomplished, she told me they had names and listed them off. Tight girl. Made me work for nothing. Haha.

And then she made me stay in her room until she fell asleep, doing random tasks for her, and finally just making me stand there until she fell asleep.

Why this story? Cause it's something I want to remember and treasure. This spoiled kid (cause she is) shed tears. All stuck up pretenses aside, she was genuinely sad and crying out. Universal, I think. We might downplay it cause let's be real some tears are more "acceptable" than others. Mom dying vs mom coming late, etc. But that pain, that pit of hut is the same.

I was reminded of my helplessness as all I really did for her was just sit there and stand there. I was reminded of pain and how even if I'm older, I still cry (sometimes). I was reminded of love because all I wanted her to know was she's loved and treasured.

But yes, if a female cries, gg. You kick a man's balls, but those tears man reach deep. Lolz. And as I'm sitting her typing this, I hear her snore. Haha. Oh humanity, so odd.